This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)
Well, it's only Tuesday but we're already mired in a situation of Abe's making which has angered co-workers and pissed off roadies. In an obvious joke video that could be seen as an obvious joke video, Abe was running through the iHeart floor yesterday and pulling out merch from the Taylor Swift tour that belonged to members of the KISS.FM staff. His assumption was that this overpriced tour trash that people had been camping out for two nights before the actual first concert took place was given to them for free. While we can no confirm or deny that this was the case, the joke that went too far ticked off everybody. As I explained, the concept behind the video was plain as day. Abe was sneaking over while KISS was on air and he was stealing their Taylor Swift merch to sell at a reduced cost. Laughs were to be had, it was a fun morning nonsense video and more than anything else, it was posted to the stations pages and Facebook group. If this was reality, he would not be tossing it out there all willy nilly like that. Of course, because sarcasm is a lost art, Abe ended up getting 10+ DM's about the merch. They wanted to know how much he wanted for it and how they could get their hands on it. Now, initially the shirts were going for like $50 a piece so it should have been a red flag that he was selling them on the cheap. More so, people who should have actually known better were hitting him up, further cementing that the human race is truly doomed. Of course, none of this matters because this was all just a lead up to (drumroll) another Abe business idea. He's going to start selling Taylor Swift merchandise on Instagram, Etsy, Facebook Marketplace and anywhere else he can think of. Obviously, he's blissfully unaware of the rarity of this merch and or how anything not made by her is usually impacted by takedown strikes almost immediately but sure, let's indulge this next business venture because it's Tuesday and I'm already mentally checked out. That said, "Swifties" are quite the rabid bunch and Abe felt that yesterday when a girl on Twitter who attempted to buy the merch found out it was all a bit, got quite furious with him. Also furious were the people whose stuff Abe was rifling through. Then again, they can't be too mad because we didn't say anything when they went through the Candlebox merch we had (which was like a half eaten sandwich, a folding chair and a piece of paper that said Candlebox.) Angi, being the devil's advocate (or devil depending on the day,) suggested that Abe should have just said YOLO and sold it anyway.
Other Stuff from Today's Show
Fresh out of graduation season, we dive head first into wedding season and there is something new that needs to be known. I mean, we all know that one does not wear white to a wedding because you're stealing the spotlight and it is just tacky. Apparently this was something Abe was discussing the other day and as usual, Angi was heated about it because that's what Angi does. That said, white is not the topic of the day but instead we are looking at red. It seems that it is customary for certain members of a wedding party to wear red because it puts marital prosperity into the universe. Funny enough, wearing red to a wedding also serves to showcase that you've slept with the groom. In a situation that is familiar to me, it's kind of like the black arm band tattoos. They are meant to symbolize wearing the memory of someone you have lost on you forever so they are never forgotten. However, in the gay community, those arm bands mean that you are into (I can't say what it is here but think something horrible and you're on the right track.) Obviously, the first thing out of Angi's mouth after this revelation was that she has worn red to a wedding tons of times. Now, the easy joke here is to say I'm not shocked but I value living (slightly) so let's just keep trucking along. Angi clearly did not know that wearing red to a wedding was a symbol for banging the groom but Abe decided to help (I think that's what we call these schemes of his.) He said that guys should wear red suits to showcase they banged the bride. After doing some quick math, Angi realized that only one guy would be wearing red to the wedding and that would be Jay the Straight's brother. She dated him for a time but this was overlooked by the idea that if Abe's implementation became a thing, everyone would know that a bride slept with a bunch of dudes and vice versa with women wearing red. Abe moved us on to a discussion about junk size at the tables but Angi wondered why you would want to invite people you've slept with to your wedding in the first place? That said, this whole mess basically made her want to go revisit her wedding photos (since she can barely remember it as we discussed the other morning,) and see if any of the big breasted blondes banged her husband. Abe, on the other hand, now wants to wear red to every wedding to cause a scene I'm assuming.
Speaking of sexy times, let's think back to childhood and (hold on a second, the cops are at my door.) Well, now that the FBI officer who monitors my writing understood that the segway here was meant to go from bride/groom nailing to first crushes, I'm good. Anyway, think back and try to recall your first celebrity crush. Now, this is one of the interactive game portions of the show so for anyone that didn't call in, you should just dump your crush over on our socials. That said, the point of this was for Angi & Abe to guess the age of the person who submitted their crush. Spoiler Alert: they were really terrible at it. Before we got to the Request Line calls, Abe submitted his which were Cheetara from Thundercats and Miss Elizabeth. This allowed Angi to guess Abe is in his early 40's. As for Angi, she crushed hard on Ralph Macchio and Michael Jackson. Funny enough, a person younger than Angi who only knew Michael for being a (allegedly) boy-hungry pedophile was disgusted by her liking him. They didn't know about him when Angi did, when he was young, blacker and talented as hell. The guess for Angi would have been late 40's (I cringed typing that because if I said her age, I would lose these hands.) Onward then to our roadie participants, the guesses and the point tallies.
Rachel: Davy Jones. Angi Guessed: 61, Abe Guessed: 63 -- Actual Age: 65. Technical point awarded to Abe.
Patrick: Winnie Cooper. Angi Guessed: 42, Abe Guessed: 44 -- Actual Age: 47. Technical point awarded to Abe.
Brian: Christina Applegate and Jessica Rabbit. Angi Guessed: 49, Abe Guessed: 42 -- Actual Age: 42. Point awarded to Abe.
Kyle: Ann Turkel. Angi Guessed: 55, Abe Guessed: 63 -- Actual Age: (I missed writing it down.) Technical point awarded to Angi.
Sean: Lynda Carter. Angi Guessed: 53, Abe Guessed: 51 -- Actual Age: 58. Technical point awarded to Angi.
Dan: Alyssa Milano and Nicole Eggert. Angi Guessed: 51, Abe Guessed: 43 -- Actual Age: 45. Technical point awarded to Abe.
Michael: Jessica Rabbit and the St. Pauli Beer Girl. Angi Guessed: 49, Abe Guessed: 38 -- Actual Age: 40. Technical point awarded to Abe.
Well, as you can see there was only one valid point scored and these two clearly suck at this game. To cap this off, Angi mentioned that she had a crush on Todd Bridges because she clearly loves bad boys. As for Abe, he also tossed in Alicia Silverstone and Sydney from Melrose Place, which was strange because that was a literal grown ass woman. If you are looking for more roadie comments or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (The Angi Taylor Show) and read up or drop us a comment.
Finally, in an exploration of how much longer can his body sustain itself, we learned this morning that Abe eats mayo every day. This incredibly unhealthy factoid came up because Angi was discussing a guy who is addicted to cheese. He loves cheese so much that he has spent about $80,000 on it and goes through 2 blocks of it a day. It would be 4 blocks but his wife sees reigning it down to 2 as a good thing. Apparently, this man is fit as a horse (sorry for triggering you Angi) and healthy as one as well with a six pack and everything. He incorporates cheese into every meal and considers it his vice as he doesn't smoke or do anything fun. Of course, even though he has been given a doctor's seal of approval, Abe wants a peek at his arteries. Though the caloric deficit probably keeps him together, we suggest maybe not eating 2 blocks of cheese a day. Then again, Angi & Abe are both lactose intolerant so maybe it's more of a jealousy thing than anything else.
Request Wars 2.0
Champion: Angi (Streak: 1)
Angi's (repping Reed) Song Choice: "Tomorrow" by Silverchair
Abe's (repping The Count) Song Choice: "Whole Lotta Rosie" by AC/DC
10 O' Clock Toast:
Toastee: Tommy Lee's wife Brittany Furlan
When asked how she feels about her husband slinging D pics all over the interwebs, she basically said she was fine with it and that nudity doesn't bother her so let him show off the whole hog all he wants.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
You know how many times I've worn red to a wedding?" - Angi
"You should have just sold it (the Taylor Swift merch,) what are they (the KISS.FM staff) going to do about it?" - Angi
"I cry all day, everyday, about everything." - Angi