Abe

Abe

Abe Kanan was born and raised on the south side of Chicago and grew up hanging out at Metro, Aragon, Riv, and all of Chicago’s music venues, checking...Full Bio

 

Angi Takes a Tumble (Out of the Shower) - ATS - 7.8.24

Delicate morning pampering. Displeased confused young woman in shower cap and wrapped in towel frowning face smelling armpit sweat isolated over beige background

Photo: SementsovaLesia / iStock / Getty Images

This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.

Call in Point:

(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)

Oh hey there, hi, good morning. That's right, we are back and if any of you expected to hear some kind of wacky, delusional, insane stories after a whole week away ... then clearly you are a devoted roadie and knew you were going to get just that. So, Angi took a trip to New York for her best friend's birthday which in turn became a weird celebrity get-together as well. Where else would you ever hear about Dwayne Wade and Busy Phillips hanging out in the same place after all? However, that drunken bash was not the star of the New York trip because that honor belonged to a malfunctioning fire alarm and Taylor Taking a Tumble (if you get this reference, good on you.) The first part of this "tragic" tale starts with the return from the party where everyone was too drunk and ready to sleep. However, the fire alarm in the hotel had different ideas and proceeded to go off awakening everyone and sending them fleeing in case the fire was real (and not just in Angi's head as you probably wrongfully assumed.) This would proceed to happen 7 more times after that, each timed between falling back asleep and annoying enough that the fire department even showed up. The biggest issue though came when Angi went to take a shower in a combination bathtub/shower. See, getting out of this was a little slippery and grandma took a tumble into some porcelain. Though she braced the fall, her knee took the brunt of it and it "caused a bone to pop up." Not content with just that delusion, Angi consulted with Dr. Google and AngiMD to discover that she has Osgood Schlatter Disease. Weirdly enough, Marris actually has this and Angi felt seen for him trying to hone in on her imaginary issues (of course.) Marris' was not caused by falling in the shower but because he grew too fast for his knees and they couldn't keep up. Also, this disease usually happens in adolescents and not 79 year old women. Combining that, plus her new bone in her leg and toss in some mosquito bites that she is allergic to and you have a summer where Angi is afraid to show off the gams. However, since we can't leave you with the thought of a 84 year old woman not showing some ankle all summer, it seems that a solution was created. Angi will be getting a knee brace because that will bring her all the attention she so desperately desires but refuses to say aloud that she is seeking. In other words, it seems we did not miss a beat the week that we were gone.

Other Stuff from Today's Show

Assuming you had your fill of delusion above, let's use the Daily Discussion Topic to bring us back to some semblance of reality. When she wasn't falling down, Angi spent the rest of our vacation on the couch watching everything on Youtube and streaming services. One of those stumbled upon shows was Netflix's Worst Roommate Ever. In this true crime break down, the show explored terrible and psychotic roommates in a Dateline kind of format. This led Angi to think about when she had a bad roommate in college. The girl was a mess who had a boyfriend that was in jail (red flag) that would collect call the house all day (redder flag) but most important, the phone bill was in Angi's name (blazing hot red flag.) Needless to say, the roommate moved out the moment the giant massive terrible no good awful phone bill finally dropped and left Angi holding having to pay for it. I probably should add that this woman had a baby as well that she would just leave alone in her room and go to the gym without a second thought, which led Angi to realize that she was sort of stuck watching it (and you would think this would have kept her from having a kid herself and yet.) As luck would have it though, Angi ended up at a restaurant where the former roommate was a waitress a year later. She was with co-workers and she made sure they ran up the bill as much as one can with other radio slobs. Once they were filled, they proceeded to dine and dash and stick her former roomie with the bill, which was close to what she had owed Angi. As for Marris, he had a bad roommate who had a cat that he couldn't take care of (because he didn't care.) Now, it should be noted that Marris is allergic to p....eople's pets and cats are the highest culprit on that list. The cat desired a ton of attention, was always sick and puked everywhere. One time, the roommate woke up and even stepped in the cat vomit and just went along with it. Now, with these two established, we moved to the Request Line (that was as expected upon a return plagued with errors.) Kim told us about how in college she had a Russian roommate who came in at 2 A.M., demanded the bottom bunk of the bunk bed and forced Kim to buy her drinks on Kim's 21st birthday at the bar. Matt's roommate peed on his bed after a disagreement in a drunken revenge which caused Matt to just up and move out. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Up next, we took a look at passive aggressive terms as passive aggressive people make Angi crazy. Here are some hyper passive aggressive phrases that you may use.

"Good for You" - This has some resentment to it and even Marris realizes it and tries to ease the usage of it. He also realized what it meant when all the people told him that when he won his two week trip.

"Must Be Nice" - Angi's mom pulled this on her when she had a babysitter coming over. (I use this all the time.)

"I'm Sorry That You Feel That Way." - Alter it to "Sorry that I made you feel that way."

"It's Fine" - If a woman says this to you, run.

"Whatever" - This means you're throwing in the towel (I say this all the time.)

"If You Say So" - This is just dismissive and shows you don't believe them.

"You're Just Too Sensitive" - This is a fight waiting to happen. You are discounting feelings and shifting the blame.

Finally, for the love of God, please stop giving "rock stars" online who ask you for money, money. A 75 year old woman is out $122,000 after "Steve Perry" sent her a Facebook message and offered her a business opportunity. After sending $72,000 in wire transfers and $50,000 in gift cards, the woman finally wised up after "Steve Perry" demanded her passport and driver's license info. She reported it to her bank and then the FBI but this isn't new. Joe Elliot from Def Leppard was complaining recently because people were pretending to be him asking for money for a glass eye, his leg falling off and a divorce from his wife. The sad truth is this only tends to happen to moms and grandparents but also should be a wake up call to check in on family members. The reality is these people are lonely and giving money makes them think they can solve it by doing so. That said, Marris added if you offer him $50 bucks here and there, he'll have a relationship with you. Dinner, a movie here and there and he won't try to steal your drivers license but no guarantee on your Ninja Turtle memorabilia.

Request Wars 3.5

Theme: Teenage Years Soundtrack

Current Champion: Marris (1x)

Angi's Song Choice: “Sabotage" by Beastie Boys

Marris' Song Choice: "Helena" by My Chemical Romance

Winner: Marris

10 O' Clock Toast:

Toastee: Julie Reinberg

This single lady gets today's toast for having the genius idea of planting golf balls with her contact info all over them on an exclusive golf course. This also led to us deciding that our next billboard will feature Marris' number and if that doesn't work, we're putting his number on Target shopping carts and yoga mats.

Show Quotes and Tidbits:

"A knee brace, then I'll get attention!" - Angi

"Cause you know, rock stars date 12 year olds." - Angi

"I don't know horror movies, I just know whore movies." - Angi


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