This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)
We are one day removed from the glorious weekend and so everyone should be celebrating that fact, right? Welp, that's clearly not the case in the Taylor household even though Jay the Straight is gone girl for the weekend to a bachelor party, which is something Angi usually loves. See, before he was safe to escape the wrath of his crazy wife for a few days, he was subjected to an eyebrow raise yesterday that spiraled into an on air unhinge this morning. While working yesterday, Angi was firing her typical line of afternoon nonsense at him via text. You know, things like "Love you," "I think we (me) may need more wine" and "That pigeon on steroids is looking to take me down and you don't believe me!" Tired of the constant dinging from his wine drunk wife, Jay the Straight (probably) put her on silent and went about his day. However, when he got home, Angi went in for a hug, kiss and in this instance, a sniff. This was where her crazy person sensors went off because she was sure she smelled lady perfume. The scent was described as baby powder, a Shein dress and double D's. Jay the Straight played it off that the scent was Downy Unstopables (free plug Downy, just saying) and then proceeded to spend the rest of the night with that shirt on. When she went to hug him before bed, she noticed the scent was gone (which Downy Unstopables don't have happen, second plug, give me money!) Angi proceeded to ask if he's cheating (he's not,) if she's crazy (she is) and what Marris thought (he was looking for a new job.) Angi then went down the list of things that men do when they start cheating like going to the gym, dress differently, want to try new sex positions, smell of a new scent and get a burner phone with one number in it that he hides in his sock drawer. Marris, eternal voice of reason added that maybe there was a long tight hug that was aeromatic. Of course, the huge than became the issue because how dare he hug a woman (allegedly) for a long time. Marris tried as he usually does to be the voice of reason and calm the crazed beast but she apparently was ready to let it go. She wanted him to have fun at the bachelor party weekend that he's clearly taking his side hoe to. All of this nonsense led to her having nightmares, not being able to sleep and coming into work early (which in itself is its own nightmare.) She also pressed Marris to ask if he's ever been accused of cheating when he wasn't. He has been but that was because he has mouthy friends who say too much. Though in that instance he wasn't cheating (keyword: that time.) Before we put this to bed, roadie Mike called to say his girlfriend once thought he was cheating after getting a call from his female boss. Tristan got too long of a hug from a co-worker once that also led to a woman acting up. I think the takeaway here is that women are crazy. To cap all this off though, Angi added one final thought. She's now settled with the idea that Jay the Straight is moonlighting as a Macy's spray girl to cover his gambling debts but she will now be implementing junk sniffing like sports do random drug testing.
Other Stuff from Today's Show:
After her brutal takedown of men and man hating in general, Angi decided to answer some questions from men to show that she's not that awful (see: cruel, mean, rude, man hating.) She meant to speak for all women but sassy roadie Pam stepped up to the plate and helped her shoulder the burden. As this is a different kind of Daily Discussion Topic, I'm going to break these notes into Q&A&Excess.
Q: How do you shampoo long hair?
A: You need to use shampoo on the head/scalp and then use conditioner for the bottom part of the hair.
E: This blew Marris' mind and there was some more in there about shedding but we know women are wookies so.
Marris Q: Why do you have to look at everything in a store while shopping?
A: Women love to window shop and they tend to be loyal to what they like in a moment but their brain spirals when given tons of options.
E: Angi explained it in deodorant shopping. Men usually buy one but women see fifteen of them and need to explore them all before making a choice. Add that to basically all shopping trips.
From here on we add Pam to the mix but she had a question first.
Pam Q: Do all women fake the O or is she the only one?
A: All women do, consider it 50/50. If you think a woman hasn't faked it with you, she has.
Camel Toe Tim Q: Do women do the "sniff test" before a date?
A: Angi and Pam said for the first time, they definitely do.
E: Marris almost threw up in the studio at the mention of stuck toilet paper.
Mike Q: How do women with long nails wipe?
A: Angi and Pam said not with the nails, you learn to use the pads of your fingers.
Manny Q: Why do men have to always guess what women are thinking?
A: Angi got reasonable and Pam got savage. Angi explained that women play fast and loose with their thoughts and that men are "simple creatures." Pam said women don't have emotional constipation and then called Manny fat.
E: Manny went into a diatribe about french fry ordering and how sometimes women don't want food but then they do and they steal his. Marris tried in vain to save him but this was a massacre.
Not everything was about man hating today though because you can't be in a sour mood when it is National Margarita Day! Well, actually you can be because Angi yelled at Marris this morning for not bringing it a margarita machine when he arrived at 4:30 A.M. Since it is a drunken holiday, Angi offered up some boozy facts. 76% of people love margaritas (not me, I throw up from tequila.) Angi and Marris both don't like salt on their rims but they both do love Tajín. Also shared preference was having them on the rocks because slushie margs feel like you're drinking ice according to Angi and that there's no booze in there. Marris is a fan of the anejo tequila whereas Angi likes only that top shelf expensive stuff and anything below that would make her throw a bottle at you. Another fun fact, others prefer it frozen and it is the third most popular drink worldwide. People also like to enjoy a cheeseburger (in paradise) with their frozen margaritas. These two bucked that trend as well, opting for tacos instead to be washed down. 50% of people like to drink on vacation (as opposed to Angi and I who like to drink all day on the couch.) Angi described her perfect margarita as spicy with jalapeno and Tajín on the rim. Angi then showcased that she carries Tajín (all the sponsorships we deserve today, seriously!) in all her handbags. Marris was shocked when she started digging through her purse on air and then once she found the Tajín, she did a dab of it. After demanding tequila by 8 A.M. from Marris, Angi expected the rest of us to do the same.
Finally, we got ourselves into some country nonsense that spilled into controversy surrounding Beyoncé's takeover of the country radio stations. As most know, rock can easily spill over into country and plenty of artists like Darius Rucker, Aaron Lewis and now Beyoncé have bridged from rock and or R&B to the well loved genre. It also seems that the older some artists get, the more appealing Country and Americana become. This all spawned from the initial pushback of Beyoncé breaking into the country charts and securing a number 1 spot, which was a first for an African American woman. Not content though, rumor has it her next album will be a rock album so we may even hear her on Rock 95.5. However, what we're really here to explore is how her new song "Texas Hold 'Em" sounds a lot like the theme song from the show Franklin. After giving it an on air listen, one can definitely say that she without a doubt 1000% lifted the track and layered her own on it. Even though she's probably going to get sued silly, we feel that everyone should be open minded when it comes to music and love it as much as we do.
Request Wars 3.0
Current Champion: Marris (1x)
Angi's Song Choice: “Same Ol' Situation" by Mötley Crüe
Marris' Song Choice: "Filthy" by Ayron Jones
Winner: Angi (by a 2-1 Rock, Paper, Scissor off)
10 O' Clock Toast:
Toastee: Justin Fields
With all the rumors swirling about what might or might not happen, Fields went on a podcast to say he still "messes with the Bears." This may or may not confirm conscious uncoupling but basically, Justin is that girl at the bar at 1 A.M. that you know you can go home with but what's this, a hotter girl may have just walked in.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
"He sounds like he (Manny) doesn't let food waste." - Savage Roadie Pam