Abe Kanan was born and raised on the south side of Chicago and grew up hanging out at Metro, Aragon, Riv, and all of Chicago’s music venues, checking...Full Bio


Teachers - ATS - 4.23.24

This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.

Call in Point:

(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)

Well, today was definitely one for the books and let me tell you, I almost had too much content to be worth sifting through some you know this is the cream of the crap and as I tend to say sometimes, definitely check out today's podcast to get the full, bonkers experience. In fact, I could use that as a perfect way to lead into this, some people have probably never listened to The Angi Taylor Show podcast (what's wrong with you!) They would join others in our Daily Discussion Topic like the 4% of people who have never had a headache. That mind boggling stat created the question of what's something you've never done or experienced that most people have but before we get to the roadies, let's explore this some. First, how is it possible that they've never had a headache, it's so wild to consider that Marris actually wants to meet these people. He wants to know their diet, exercise routine and if they've ever drank, gone outdoors or had a medical procedure to cure that pounding nightmare. Hell, Angi gets a headache from just having the air conditioning blowing on her in the car. Let's explore Marris though (because Angi needed time to think of a proper answer and still kind of fumbled it imo.) Marris was taught to swim but never retained it apparently. You see, his soccer coach was also his swim teacher and during the final test, Marris just walked and bounced to pretend he was swimming. Mind you, he was in the kiddie end of the pool doing this but you know, coach McGuirk was a bit too busy to notice or care. Angi, once again, offered to teach Marris how to swim and he said this would be the 20th year of people trying to get him in the water. She would get those Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle floaties and make sure he finally made it to the deep end. Now that she finally had time to think, Angi settled on that she's never experienced childbirth. I know what you're going to say "but Jay, her meat folder has definitely copied a human and birthed it" to which I will add her rebuttal, she had an emergency C section. As she explained, a lot of things have been pushed up there but nothing has ever been pushed out. I would have to consider mine as well as I'm sure I have several but let's just go with "been sober" to confirm Marris' question toward me during the 10 o'Clock toast yesterday. However, we are just but humble servants to the roadies, the real reason for this show so let's go to the Request Line and get their additions. Lisa has never had a brain freeze even though she has had Slurpees and bites into ice cream. David has never had chicken pox which is technically a bad thing as an adult as he would come to find out. Angi got it at 6 and Marris had it in first grade. Pamela has never been on a plane due to not being able to afford it because of opportunity, time and money. If given the chance, she would go to the Bahamas. Nick has never put on Chapstick or lotion, which you know, sent these two off the track. Marris asked if he was sandpaper and Angi said to go find lotion, put it on his arms and face and call back to let them know how much greater his life is. Theresa called to say she has never cliff dived but would like to try it. Angi added that she and Marris have never skydived. Theresa then mentioned she has been parasailing and that sent Angi to that moment where death came for her once more. You see she was in Jamaica (I know you already hear "Angel" in your head.) She was with her boyfriend and the wind started to pick up and whipped her around, causing the cables to intertwine and when she called for them to bring the duo in, they released the ropes and she fell into a barrier reef. Then she was dragged under the water (blah blah blah.) Theresa added that she works at O'Hare and though she didn't forget to order the Boeing door that fell off she knew of another plane that had the door fall off into a river. Right, never ever fly is the moral of all this. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Other Stuff from Today's Show

As I said, today's show was madness and to showcase that let's scapegoat Marris who got all the business this morning for washing his chicken. Whereas Angi thought the whole thing was ridiculous (mind you after asking him if he uses Dawn to do it,) she suggested that you should just rinse it. Marris explained that there is chicken slime and mother of the year Angi told him to just eat it (or he gets no pudding.) The reason we had this spirited debate about rinsing your food had to do with cheese. As Angi explained it "you know that dusty stuff on packaged shredded cheese?," well that is an anti-caking agent to keep it from lumping. Some companies use corn starch and some use ground up wood pulp. Obviously, this stuff is safe in small amounts but people are nuts and so the new trend is to wash your cheese. People dump it into a colander, wash it with water and then dry it with a paper towel. When doing this, you see cloudiness because you are washing away the agent used but at the same time, cleaning your cheese has a drawback. Once you do this, you can't return it to the package or the fridge. Marris, voice of wisdom, suggested that you just be fat and go to the fridge and eat it from the bag like he and Angi do. This is especially prevalent when high but it's so much better that way. Angi took it further (of course) and suggested that people just buy a block of cheese and shred their own because it's cheaper and not coated. Now, Marris had already bought himself a ticket to Ridicule City and then offered up a second round of punishment for himself. Marris explained that he would sometimes wash a steak as well but has foregone that now that he goes to a butcher. Angi, queen of the Jewel steaks, lost her stack because she was now one of the meat peasants. Marris though will also inspect his steaks to see if they are having a heavy flow day because he is disgusted by blood. After a quick detour back to chicken and sauce falling out followed by suggesting that cheese washing is a dumpable offense, we learned that Marris doesn't mind a little blood and that is exactly what you think when you read that.

In a "this seemed like a good idea" segment, a bunch of youngins were in the studio and polled on what they think middle age is (incoming aneurysm.) One said 35, another 40 and another 45. After Marris returned to the land of the living from the stroke he had hearing "35," he realized what it felt like to be old for once. The thing is, old age begins later than it used to for those of us alive currently (not the interns, we pushed them down the elevator shaft for being awful.) Before disposing of them though, Angi polled what old age is. Marris said 80 while someone in the studio said 60. Ignoring that person we all hate, Angi added she thinks old age is 70. The reason for this is people die at 70 and old age is considered late 70's now. Initially in 1911 (when Angi was in high school,) old age was 71 but they also had to contend with Cholera, Scurvy and Dysentery. Angi furthered her age rant saying 75 is old and 55 is not, even though on her 50th birthday last year, she got an AARP magazine in the mail. We capped this exploration of elder abuse (calling us old at our age is 100% abuse,) by noting that anyone can sign up for AARP. College kids do it all the time for travel and food discounts and if Marris can make his "Jitterbug" phone (Angi's words obviously, she's terrible) get on the network, he should sign up for it too.

Finally, another round of "We'll give you $1,000 to watch these movies" is up and looking for a participant. This time around and since it's coming up soon, a site is celebrating Star Wars. They want to give $1,000 and a $100 gift card for snacks and streaming to binge 25 hours worth of movies (aka Episodes 1-9.) Before you run to the website to sign up though, know that they are seeking someone like HP who has never seen any of the movies. Marris wanted to fake like he was also one of those people but the giant Wookie tattoo on his chest was kind of a giveaway. Well it was that or his Luke Skywalker tramp stamp. Angi also would not qualify but that does not bother her as she has seen the first three and that was enough nerdom for her. Her excuse had to do with Carrie Fisher not being in the rest of them and when Marris explained she's in the last three, Angi yelled that she's dead. This continued on then with a look at JarJar Binks and Angi asking for Baby Yoda to show up. We capped this foray into nerdom with Marris rightfully being made fun of and Angi making her Chewbacca noise which was nothing more than her gurgling.

Request Wars 3.5

Theme: Hair Band vs. Grunge Band

Current Champion: Marris (2x)

Angi's Song Choice: “Monkey Business" by Skid Row

Marris' Song Choice: "Kitty" by The Presidents of the United States of America

Winner: Angi

10 O' Clock Toast:

Toastee: Teachers

Teacher Appreciation Week is coming up and Lou Malnati's is celebrating by offering 80 teachers a chance for free pizza for a year. All people have to do is nominate a teacher they feel deserves it and they have a chance for some delicious food. Meanwhile, Mrs. Silk, who is probably dead, is definitely getting nothing for dragging Angi by the hair out from under boys desks.

Show Quotes and Tidbits:

"A lot of things been pushed up in there but never anything pushed out." - Angi

"If there was a baby feet buffet, I would eat all day." - Angi

"I want my skin to look like McDonald's lettuce." - Angi

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